Resolved in 2012: Ask. Accept. Give.

I love New Year's Resolutions.

I differentiate them from goals. My workouts and diet goals in January, for example, are goals. I set them short term and revisit frequently.

Resolutions, on the other hand, are yearly and more conceptual. I thought long about this year's.

For a while, I thought I might not have anything for this year, but that couldn't be. I just needed to work on how to articulate where I'm at and where I'm going. I'm ready to take on some pretty big challenges. And so, here it is. In 2012, I resolve to:

1. Ask for what I need.
2. Accept what others can give.
3. Give what and whenever I can.

My 2012 resolution starts with the hard part and progresses through to the easy bit.

Since arriving in Los Angeles in 2002, I've always tried to help others when I could. I've visualized throwing as many people up over my head as possible. And figured someday, maybe a hand would come down to help me up. Or over. Or just give a hearty shake. I'm not keeping track. It's not about tit for tat. It's not about expectation. It's certainly not about vested interest. It's about doing what I could when I could and being beyond happy if I was ever in a position to help anyone.

Because I'm pretty far down the entertainment totem pool, so really, it's a rare day when I can truly help someone. I'm very grateful when I can.

And I'm kicking it up a notch in 2012. Doing some volunteer work. But that's the easy bit.

The second part is aptly two-pronged. Accepting what others can give in terms of respecting where someone's coming from and what they are able and willing to give is fairly easy. I'm big on respecting what people say about themselves, and so what someone says about their current abilities and desires in any given situation, I would tend to accept naturally and graciously.

But, it occurred to me after I wrote the sentence, that there is also the actual accepting of something being given.

That's much more difficult for me, and starts to get to the overall point.

I'm very self-sufficient. And I can't get where I'd most like to be by myself. I've known that since film school, but never really said it out loud, in a sense. It's been the elephant in my usually empty room. It scares the crap out of me.

I once sat and listened to a panel, years ago now, where a director said that if you didn't have significant family and spousal support to become a director, you weren't ever going to make it. I didn't give up then, but I didn't really let myself hear it, either. The truth of it is that you can't do it alone. Not by a long shot.

I need to gracefully accept help when it is given. I need to be open to what others can and will give.

So, OK.

Then there's the biggie. The reaching out. The asking. The believing in the impossible and asking others to join the crazy team. Dreaming and sharing and saying, Hey, Here's what I think would be awesome, want to help? Want to join us?

1. Can you...
2. OK, That would be great. Thank you. And no matter what...
3. What can I do for you?

Happy 2012, everybody. It's going to be adventure.